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How do you tell if the lovely woman or man that has gotten your attention is lovely between the ears? What determines that you want to get married and live with your potential spouse for the rest of your life? You could be married for at least sixty years. It is a given that your spouse and you will change throughout the marriage. Do you think you can live with a spouse that is constantly changing? Do you think your spouse can put up with you as you change as you get older and feeble?
What do you use to evaluate a man or woman when you meet them for the first time? Is it his or her hair, physique, personal hygiene, skin color, poise, clothes, attitude, car, cologne, eyes, facial features, appearance of their toes in flip flops, appearance of having money, personality, education, political views, honesty, speaking skills, etc.? There are some things you need to do to exercise caution in evaluating a person. Do not use nail polish that is on the little toes as an evaluation criterion of a person if the toes cannot be seen when wearing shoes.
Have you met a very lovely woman or a hunk of a man and you felt you had to get a date with him or her? During the date you found that you were on a date with a person that is mentally five eggs short of a dozen. You believed that there was available space in their brain to add lots of smarts. What do you do? I have found that physical good looks can only offset mental idiosyncrasies for a short period of time before the idiosyncracies make the physical good looks become not important.
A change in a major aspect of your life will influence other aspects of your life. Attitudes can quickly change when your life experiences a major shock. A change in major attitudes brings about a change in your personality. People you know will be puzzled by the changes in your behavior. As your physical appearance changes due to normal life occurrences, you will start to look different, feel different, have less energy, have to purchase new clothes, and put up with people making comments about your appearance. These changes will impact the way you act and how people react to you.
Aspects of a person can change as the person changes his life style and beliefs. An example is a person’s physique can, in twelve months, change from an excellent physique into a marshmallow physique by eating just 500 more calories each day. The additional calories can add a pound a week to the person’s weight. Do not fool yourself into thinking you are not able to eat 500 more calories each day. Do you like to eat candy, ice cream, cookies, pastries, and chips and drink soft drinks? Calories can easily slip into your mouth and leave you with two options. You can spit out the calories or swallow the calories.
What makes a person what he is today and tomorrow is located between his ears. You can forget all the other things people use to identify a person. It is what is contained in the brain that should be reviewed and evaluated. The values a person has determine what he will become and what he will do. What a person does reflect is what he believes. When what a person says and what he believes is not backed up by his actions, he is not telling the truth about himself.
Excellent speaking skills can be a misleading skill. A skilled speaker can say a lot of words that seem to say something but actually can say nothing. Politicians are excellent examples of people saying what they think people want to hear.
Surface features that can be easily changed are foolish things to use to decide the value of a person. If you are a shallow person, can you guess what you will use to evaluate the people you meet?
If you are going to depend on a person to make decisions for you, control things about your life, control your money, etc., you better make sure the person is what you think he is. If he is not competent, trustworthy, or wise, you will regret your decision. He can mess up your life if you are not careful.
As people get older, they will change. If they are married, the changing may cause problems with their spouse. Lots of things can influence how a person changes. You change so do not be quick to point a finger at your spouse for causing problems in your marriage. You may think your spouse has changed, and your spouse may think you have changed. A good probability is you and your spouse have changed. Good communication between husband and wife is critical to handling the impact of a person changing to help support a good marriage.
Often a person has to struggle with which politician to support with his vote. In today’s political atmosphere, misinformation is distributed about each candidate by their opponent. How do you determine which information is true? At some time you will have to make a decision as to what you will use to select the candidate you will support. Do you use sound evaluations to pick the candidate, or do you use surface level things to select a candidate? Sound bites are poor ways to determine what a politician actually believes. Some people decide for whom they will vote according to the color of their ears and if an ear ring is often attached. What is between the ears is where you find out what a person represents and supports.
Do not forget to pay attention to a person’s attitudes. If you understand the person’s attitudes, you will often be able to determine how they will react in daily situations. Understanding your spouse is important to help you appropriately respond to what your spouse does and says.
An between the ears attitude that impresses me is a person that takes responsibility for what he says and does. He does not constantly try to place blame for his fool hardy decisions on someone else.
Dale “The Saint” Lee
A former resident of Pot Neck, Tennessee
Date last changed August 29, 2010
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